England 1-4 Germany

Apart from a 10-minute spell in the 1st half, England were murdered by a wonderful Germany performance in which their three strikers finished neatly from accomplished attacking build-ups. The German's two 2nd half goals came as a result of thrilling counter-attacks the English would have been proud of.

David James wasn't given much of a chance although he still managed to cock-up the 3rd goal. Gareth Barry's awful lack of pace was cruelly exposed for the German's fourth. Comical defending was on display for the opponents two goals in the opening half an hour. I stood in disbelief when Capello brought off James Milner and replaced him with the ineffective Joe Cole. Milner was our only player providing width out on the right flank and was having a great game. As soon as Joe Cole came on, the Germans caught us on the counter-attack in two lethal moments down that right flank as the substitute failed to cover back.

Glen Johnson was a continual liability at right-back whilst Terry looked insecure throughout. (At least Matthew Upson managed to score with his face which about knocked him out!) Ashley Cole struggled along too. We had a painfully familiar empty left flank as Gerrard, playing out of position on the left, continuously gravitated inside, leaving our attacks far too narrow and almost always breaking down.

Another mystery was the introduction of Heskey who poses no goal threat whatsoever and touched the ball once in 20 minutes. I find it an absolute travesty that Peter Crouch was only given seven minutes in our four matches. The extent to which he has been overlooked can only be explained by the manager. Rooney had a wretched world cup in which he barely managed a shot on target, let alone control the ball properly.

I'm really sorry to say this about the manager, but I think he's got everything completely wrong. He chose the wrong 23 players, played certain members of the squad in wrong positions, and made mind-boggling substitutions which have totally defeated us.

Why are Adam Johnson, Ashley Young and Gabby Agbonlahor sitting at home in England? Why aren't they terrorising defences in South Africa? Are Joe Cole, Shaun Wright-Phillips and Emile Heskey really better than them? Unfathomable.

It's time for a complete clear-out. This entire World Cup performance has been wretched at best, a horrifying attempt at passing a ball, a complete disaster of a formation, and a vivid display of tactical naivety. We are simply not good enough in all departments. Our players lack skill, tactical awareness and basic ball control.

What was I saying about a bunch of monkeys?

England versus Germany

And so our old foes Germany wait in the wings for tonight's last 16 clash in Bloemfontein. Everyone is fit and ready, I'd like to see Peter Crouch given a chance alongside Rooney. I'm refusing to get too carried away however, because I've still not seen anything that suggests this England team are any good. So let's calm down, don't get our expectations too high, and just hope that the lads put in a good performance, which is severely overdue - and hope it doesn't go down to penalty kicks!

COME ON ENGLAND!!!

P.S. Oh yeah, I'd just like to extend my congratulations to Ghana for knocking out the U.S. of A last night! Well done! In the words of Landon Donovan, good things do happen! Great things!

Tame lions put on monkey show

I wasted two hours of precious sleep in the early hours of this morning as the bunch of monkeys known as England completely embarrassed the nation yet again.

It would have been more pleasant picking through a bag of tripe than the wreckage that was strewn across the pitch by our inept players.

An absolutely wretched performance has left us on the brink of elimination with only one goal and no wins to show for 180 minutes' work against USA and Algeria. The fact that we were unable to carve out a single decent chance against the north African outfit shows the depths to which we have sunk. There are no more excuses. They have all been wrung dry and thus we are left with the hard facts.

Steven Gerrard

I don't understand what Gerrard's role was on the pitch. What was the point of him playing? It's a tragic shame that we didn't learn this lesson four years ago - that Steven Gerrard is incapable of passing the ball to a teammate in an England shirt. He wasted every half chance that came our way and was awful throughout. His corner kicks were dismal. How he even came to be the captain of his country is beyond me. That in itself is a joke worth laughing at for the next four years. I struggle to believe how he got into the squad, let alone the starting eleven. The most over-rated waste of space in the squad.

Aaron Lennon

Lennon contributed absolutely nothing on the right wing and looked completely out of his depth. The times he did get on the ball he agonisingly cut inside onto his left foot and from there everything broke down. Why was he not using his explosive pace and running against the Algerian defence? Why was he not doing everything to get to the byline and give us some much-needed width which was so painfully absent? The best thing that happened to him was being hauled off in the 62nd minute, but hope was turned to misery as his replacement was Shaun Wright-Phillips, another one who managed to get into the squad who shouldn't really be there.

Glen Johnson

While half decent going forward, Glen Johnson replicated his Liverpool defensive form by being torn apart by the Algerians, and were the Africans a little more composed, we would have been punished even further. Glen Johnson simply can't defend and is a huge liability at right-back.

Wayne Rooney

What was wrong with our main man? He looked increasingly frustrated as the match wore on. He couldn't control the ball to save his life and lost possession every time he received it. There was none of the usual fire in his play, he failed to get England motivated. He never roughed up the Algerian defenders and looked more like a tame lion cub than a 34-goal scoring machine.

The absence of Peter Crouch

We had a six foot seven inch striker sitting on the bench for 83 minutes of this match. Why? That fat old lump called Heskey, try as he might, did nothing, and the match was crying out for Crouch to give us something different. There was only 7 minutes left by the time he did make an entrance, too late to make any impact on the game. And why didn't we put balls into the box, to the back post, for Crouch to get nod-downs? Because we are completely naive tactically and didn't know how to use our lanky bean-pole striker properly. Crouch is tall, has two wonderful feet, and should have been starting with Rooney.

It was so terrible that I began cheering on Algeria in the closing stages of the match. If we did snatch a late winner it would have been completely undeserved. The Algerians, shockingly, were much better in possession, kept the ball better, and were so comfortable on the ball, that it put us to shame.

I doubt we will beat Slovenia. Another draw will not be good enough and England will deservedly be facing an early flight home. These are the dry facts, because, simply, there is no room for willying around, pretending we are a good team, finding excuses, blah blah blah.

Fabio Capello

Started the wrong players against Algeria. Glen Johnson, Gerrard and Heskey shouldn't be in the team, but they are because Capello failed to select his 23 wisely. Imagine the width Adam Johnson, Ashley Young and Gabby Agbonlahor would have provided, which was so terribly lacking. Imagine Paul Scholes instead of Gerrard, controlling the match from the centre circle, spraying probing passes around the pitch. Could Capello have persuaded Scholes a little more forcefully? Why did he call up an eternal cripple in Ledley King who has now, after one match, injured himself for the rest of the tournament? Following Carragher's second booking we are now left with Upson or Dawson to partner a fragile Terry in the heart of our defence.

Nothing makes sense with our entire World Cup ride. I'm sorry to say that it's a complete shambles. The monkey show is in full force. The lions have gone into hiding.

One disgruntled and severely embarrassed Englishman.

World Cup Fever Hits Kuantan

Megamall Kuantan has been hit with World Cup fever with much fun and games on offer at the Ground Floor. Lauren enjoyed mingling with the balloon-decorated monkeys striking football poses whilst I stood proudly beside a poster of Spain's David Villa. . . . . . talking of Spain, they lost 1-0 to a well-organised Switzerland side managed by a familiar face, Ottmar Hitzfeld. The Swiss scored the scrappiest goal of the World Cup so far, but Spain couldn't reply and suffered a shock defeat in their opening match.

I suddenly feel so much better about ENGLAND!!!

World Cup on a 27" screen

The FIFA World Cup in South Africa is now on its sixth day but I haven't as yet blogged anything about it. The matches are a bit boring in all honesty, and apart from Germany's demolition of Australia, there haven't been many goals to get excited about.

The opening match of the tournament was one of the more entertaining affairs. A magnificent defence-splitting pass followed by a finish to match gave South Africa the lead.

Mexico's star Giovanni Dos Santos was impressive, linking midfield with attack, providing the creative spark for all of Mexico's attacks. He looked very much like a Ronaldinho at Barcelona. After 45 minutes I had warmed to this guy and I think he's going to be an absolute star - maybe not in this World Cup but definitely in the future. He has more skill in his two feet than the entire England team put together.

There have been a number of boring games which have been compounded by England's poor result against the U.S of A which seemed to deflate a nation after such high hopes. But South Africa, Mexico, France, Italy, Portugal and Ivory Coast all likewise began their campaigns with draws. I am hoping the World Cup heats up as we go into the 2nd round of group matches today.

We have a 27" screen Sony TV to watch the games on and so far that's going well and has enhanced our viewing pleasure - we're just waiting for more entertaining games.

It weighs a tonne but we're grateful to our friend Raymond, for his generosity in offering this TV set to us.

A bunch of monkeys indeed

I am sick and tired and fed up of England football team.

I am sorry to say that they are simply incapable and inept when it comes to the world stage. We have a decent starting 11 but a lousy back up of players. Our players can't handle pressure or perform when it matters. Our inability to beat a team where football is not amongst the first three sports in that country, shows how weak we are. That is an absolute embarrassment, particularly as Gerrard said before the USA game that we were going to show to the world what we are capable of. (Laughing my head off!)

We now go into a must-win match against Algeria with self-imposed added pressure because of an awful mistake from an awful goalkeeper who shouldn't even be in the squad of 23, let alone the number one keeper! Come on Capello!!! Everyone knows Joe Hart is easily our best and most in-form keeper!!!

And now it seems that Ledley King will be missing the rest of the tournament - surprise, surprise. This is the guy who is injured every week of the year, every season of his career, an eternal cripple, and he somehow gets called up to the England squad? Nothing about our selection or team or squad makes sense. We will be lucky to make it out of the group now. Worryingly we are now left with centre-backs as follows: Jamie Carragher, Matthew Dawson, Matthew Upson. Doesn't exactly fill me with confidence. We will soon get found out big time.

I've lost all interest in England's world cup adventure...but anyway, it won't last long.




Roll on Roger Federer and Wimbledon! I prefer to watch someone with a little quality.

Gaz is here, World Cup starting tonight!

My brother, Gaz, arrived safely and well on Wednesday and is still adjusting to the new time here. He has struck up a good relationship with Lauren, who busily speaks with him and plays toys with him. At the moment however, he is too busy on his ipod to build things with Lauren, so she's just doing it herself, but with running commentary!

The World Cup is starting tonight and I'm suddenly terribly excited. The kick-off seems to have crept up out of the blue and now it's here. South Africa, the hosts, begin their quest against Mexico today, and then England get started tomorrow with an interesting one against USA.

We are anxious to watch the football on our new 27" screen and to enjoy all the channels on Astro featuring the World Cup. I'm getting a slight headache so I'm off to switch on the TV, pop a caffox, eat some fish, and sit back and relax in front of the box.

Can England really do it and go all the way? Or will it all end in tears again? Is Gerrard a suitable captain? Will Rooney be fighting fit and fresh? Who will partner Terry in defence? And who will our goalkeeper be? (Seems obvious to me - Joe Hart) All will be answered soon!

2 DAYS TO GO

We have three lions on our badge. Now let's play like lions.

3 DAYS TO GO

I'm getting a bit excited now...

Dare We Dream

4 DAYS TO GO

FIFA World Cup South Africa 2010